Departure of Undersecretary Douglas Feith

At last, one of the idiots who led us into the debacle in Iraq is leaving: DoD Announces Departure of Undersecretary Douglas Feith.

According to the cognoscenti, he was the worst of the bunch (and that's saying a lot). He was in charge of "Policy" in the DOD - which means he was the one who let us believe that the attack was necessary and (who knows) could be the one who ordered the devastation at Abu Ghrab and Gitmo.

The worst part of it is, his claim for leaving is "personal and family reasons." As someone who actually likes living creatures and as someone capable of the human emotion of love I resent that a moral vampire like Feith uses his family as an excuse for getting out while the getting is good.

I also resent the fact that the only Jews that Bush has in his employ are shameful; but I guess they best reflect Bush's worldview: "Weaker at home, shamed around the world."

Backpost finished 2/11/05, 12:20 AM

AUGH - Johnny Carson Dies at 79

AAAAAUGH!! Late-Night King Johnny Carson Dies at 79 - When did this creep up?! Wow, what a shock. Oy, the great comic greats are dying.

The Definition of a Hack

William Safire wrote in his paean for the Second Bush Second Inauguaral that

"I rate it among the top 5 of the 20 second-inaugurals in our history."

No kidding. Safire really said that.

To be honest, Safire probably wrote those lines a few days ago in anticipation of his needed approval. Safire is an expert on language (even though his language columns reek with doctrinaire pedantry) and I challenge him to define himself as anything but a hack, at this point.

Shameless too.

Backpost finished 2/11/05

Centre or Center?

As if you need more proof that the Kabbalah Center is evil, it appears that they are claiming that were they back in the time of the Shoah, they could have prevented it through the powers of [wait for it] The Kabbalah. On sale now, at the Centre.

See for yourself: Madonna's Kabbalah Center in Holocaust Row

Backpost finished 2/11/05

Will Eisner dies, 87

My cartoonist hero, Will Eisner, died Monday, January 3rd.

Many of you don't know me as a cartoonist (I stopped actively drawing my sophomore year in college) but Eisner had the most profound impact on my art, lettering, and narrative. My cousin Garry introduced me to Eisner (as he has done successfully with a number of my favorites, including Dave Barry) when I was very young and I just fell in love with the Spirit. When people see me dressed in a wide brimmed hat, sharp suit & tie and gloves, I am dressed as The Spirit. Oh, Will, we'll miss you.

Jerry Orbach, Star of 'Law & Order,' Dies

Jerry Orbach, Star of 'Law & Order,' Dies - he was really the only thing I liked about the newer episodes.

As I've said before, my wife got me into watching the shows which were good but in my mind not great. A good show is one that is intelligence-respecting, well-written, and entertaining. A great show is a must watch. Examples of Good shows, for me, are "Seinfeld," "The Shield," and "Cheers."

Great shows are "The West Wing," "the Sopranos," "Arrested Development," and the heliege "Simpsons."

But "Law and Order" was decent and I liked Orbach very much - it was nice seeing a plausible Jewish cop on TV.

Backpost finished 2/15/05

Israeli Flag for War Crimes

In the description of American "war crimes" (that's what the story, War Crimes [washingtonpost.com], calls 'em), which includes our friendly torture of the random prisoners in Guantanamo, the interrogators would torment their victims with

"humiliations such as being wrapped in an Israeli flag."

That's a direct quote.

I love this. I love the fact that our government is torturing people. I love the fact that the people in Guantanamo are denied civil and human rights. I love that the legal genius who allowed this to happen is our new Attorney General. I love that Bush is such a friend of Israel that he uses their flag as a tool of torture and humiliation.

Can one of you GOP supporters explain this to us?

Backpost finished 2/15/05

Oh Great, More Ghraib

According to the newest reports, Guantanamo operated under similar torture rules as did Abu Ghraib: Washpost: "At Guantanamo, a Prison Within a Prison"

Maybe I'd feel better about the torture and rape if we actually were (a) not in a fictional conflict in Iraq, (b) the prisoners were dangerous people, (c) the prisoners knew something about the people who truly are trying to hurt us. Yet there have been no convictions from the torture; no proof that what we're doing is right. We fought a war - back in 1776 - to stop this kind of stuff, no?

As it is, we are just destroying people for fun. This is shameful. Again, I implore the GOPers out there, you have a voice, talk to your commandants about stopping these un-American activities before they actually become considered American activities.

Backpost finished 2/17/05, there was just a title and a link

Kerik and Rudy

So Bernie Kerik has imploded (Lapses Feared in 2000 Vetting of Kerik) - and that's saying something for a Bush appointee. Kerik's big error was to commit his felonies *before* he joined the cabinet. The sad thing is that Kerik is so terrible that Giuliani may go down because he vouched for him!

Backpost finished 2/17/05, started Dec 17 2004 with really just one insight... I don't even know if the link works.

Protocols (Blog) Over

It's big news in the Jewish Bloggosphere, Protocols has closed!

In case that announcement means nothing to you I will explain: it means nothing to me too. There's this whole world of Jewish bloggers, growing daily, with a frightening level of cross-referencing and self-congratulations. "Protocols" was considered the mack-daddy of the Jewish Blogs because it had some important people writing for it - people so important that I'd never heard of them nor felt what they had to say was worthwhile.

I can say all this with the supercilious disinterestedness of an Old School blogger - as it says on my first post, I was blogging in the days before blogs, when Netscape ruled, when Google was still an experimental site at Stanford U, when email was still called e-mail. I don't actually expect anyone to read what I'm saying either (although I appreciate your comments) - I just need a place to release my brainwaves before they begin to rot in my skull.

Protocols is (are?) over. Long live the Blog.

Backpost finished 2/17/05, - I just had the link but I think I remember what I wanted to say

O'Reilly - A New American Hero

By "new America" I mean the world that George W. Bush has created. Fox News is nearly invincible and Bill O'Reilly is the tip of the teflon. He has survived the revelation of disgusting sexual harassment because, hey, Bush is in power not Clinton.

Now, here's some more wonderful behavior this time against Jews (who are not as numerous as women, so this will also blow away): O'Reilly attacks ADL

O'Reilly doesn't like criticism and the ADL reprimanded him for responding to a Jewish caller who said

CALLER: When I was growing up -- I'm Jewish, but I was not in a very Jewish area. There were some Jews there but, I was kind of -- grew up with a resentment because I felt that people were trying to convert me to Christianity [by introducing Christmas into schools]--

Part of O'Reilly's response:

O'REILLY: All right. Well, what I'm tellin' you, [caller], is I think you're takin' it too seriously. You have a predominantly Christian nation. You have a federal holiday based on the philosopher Jesus. And you don't wanna hear about it? Come on, [caller] -- if you are really offended, you gotta go to Israel then. I mean because we live in a country founded on Judeo -- and that's your guys' -- Christian, that's my guys' philosophy. But overwhelmingly, America is Christian. And the holiday is a federal holiday honoring the philosopher Jesus. So, you don't wanna hear about it? Impossible.

Read the whole thing; it's a hoot! Viva Bush! Viva Fox!

{2009 Update: great pic from here.}

Shoot the Moon

The last men standing after all the cabinet shuffling is Don "Dishonor" Rumsfeld and John "Freefall" Snow (Snow to Stay on With Bush) - which makes total sense. While Bush has been, overall, one of the worst leaders of a North American republic, his very worst areas have been in economic policy and in war planning.

Then again, if you see things my way, that staying part of the Bush cabinet is a grave punishment, then actually Rumsfeld and Snow are getting what they deserve! Either way it's a clear case of 'aveira gorreret aveira'

Backpost finished 2/16/05.

FBI entrapped AIPAC

Bush is the best friend Israel has ever had - at least better than Clinton - at least better than his father - or actually, I'm not sure if he's such a friend. A few months ago there was a celebrated case where a member of AIPAC was entrapped in a FBI sting. Ya see, it seems that the FBI investigated two members of AIPAC who have been accused of spying for Israel, giving them details of the secret US deliberations with the Iranians. [Recent reports accuse them of leaking the secrets of the McShwarma]. Here's the original story (CBS news)

However, as the Jerusalem Post indicates the FBI set the whole thing up. It's pretty complicated - but as far as I can tell, the FBI entrapped two AIPAC members as part of a strange paranoid witch-hunt. As this article indicates, there's a subtle double-standard against Jews in the intelligence agencies about loyalty to Israel.

Thank you Ashcroft for keeping America safe. How many terrorists have you caught yet? None?

Backpost finished, kinda, 2/17/05. This is still difficult to finish because I still don't have all the right details...

Even the Economist

In case you're wondering what kind of lily-livered pinko bleeding-heart liberals are warning about Bush's economic policies, there's the Leftist smear rag The Economist. True, The Economist is generally seen as a conservative magazine (when they say they're Tories, they mean 18th Century style), but how can they be if they claim that Bush's trade deficits and all-around economic bumbling will soon convince the world to dump dollars in favor of Euros?

Does anybody think that Bush is doing good things for the US economy? Can anyone say that our situation is truly the aftermath of 9/11 and not the results of the first MBA president (who never ran a successful company and doesn't even know what assets he himself owns?)

Thank Jezuz that Bush has a plan to save the economy by gutting social security. His evangelist-hypnotist guru must have told him that if he really wants to channel Hoover he not only needs to lose more jobs but also to plunge the country into depression. This does explain why Bush hates social-security - how else to be Hoover but to reverse everything FDR did? The next step? Bush will un-cure polio and discontinue the dime.

Backpost finished 2/16/05 - all I had was the article link, which still works, so here goes...

Song Hall of Fame: "The Royal Canadian Kilted Yaksmen", Ren & Stimpy

Oddly enough, my obsession with Ren & Stimpy is only mentioned once before on the blog. While there is much to dislike about R&S, especially the glacial pacing and almost anything after the first year, there are episodes that are pristine in my eyes. The show is an odd litmus test, you had to have a special attraction to accurate portrayal of edgy, yet cartoonish, psychosis. I understand why people don't like it. But two episodes, Stimpy's Invention and Space Madness are pure art.

The show was known, as well, for their sick humor songs ("Happy Happy, Joy Joy" is the best known). Musically, and humor-ly, the easiest to access is the title of this post: The theme of the Kilted Yaksmen.

Unofficial Website here. Lyrics and trivia from here:

The Royal Canadian Kilted Yaksmen Theme

Stimpy: Remember the royal anthem of the Kilted Yaksmen! (blows into a pitch pipe and begins singing as a lone piano plays in the background)

Our country reeks of trees,
Our yaks are really large,
And they smell like rotting beefcarcasses!
And we have to clean up after them,
And our saddle sores are the best,
We proudly wear women's clothing
and searing sand blows up our skirts!

(now an organ joins in as Ren begins singing)

Both: And the buzzards, they soar oooo-verhead
And poisonous snakes will devooooour us whole
And our bones will bleach in the sun!

Stimpy: That's it!

Both: And we will probably go to h(fart)ll
And that is our great reward
For being the uh-Rooooyal...
Canadian
Kilted
Yaksmen!

Stimpy: C'mon, everybody!

(now a big orchestra starts playing as various animals such as mudskippers, a whale, etc. start singing in bold, male voices)

Chorus: Our country reeks of trees,
Our yaks are really large,
And they smell like rotting beef carcasses!
And we have to clean up after them,
And our saddle sores are the best,
We proudly wear women's clothing
and searing sand blows up our skirts!
And the buzzards they soar oooo-verhead,
And poisonous snakes will devooooour us whole,
Our bones will bleach in the sun!
And we will probably go to h(fart)ll
And that is our great reward,
For being the uh-Rooooyal...
Canadian
Kilted
Yaksmeeeeeeeeeen!

Backpost finished 2009-12-14.

Netherlands Hospital Euthanizes Babies

Remember this about Holland: they are the first to legalize drugs, prostitution, and euthanasia - all in the name of social liberalism and progress - and it makes Holland feel like the front-lines of Sodom. Need proof about how libertines become cruel and inhuman? Check today's news:

Netherlands Hospital Euthanizes Babies

AP - AMSTERDAM, Netherlands - A hospital in the Netherlands — the first nation to permit euthanasia — recently proposed guidelines for mercy killings of terminally ill newborns, and then made a startling revelation: It has already begun carrying out such procedures, which include administering a lethal dose of sedatives.

If I ever get sick in Holland - if MY KID gets sick in Holland - drop everything and get me the hell out of there. Drag me to Germany even, just keep me away from that charnel-house.

Ridge Resigns Homeland Post

This makes what, 7? 8? resignations (AP: Ridge Resigns Homeland Post). Wouldn't it be great if Bush, dizzy with all the resignations, high on crank, gets confused and resigns as well? Yeah!

{2009 Update, great clown Ridge pic from here.}

Biur Biur Biur

It turns out that the "Biur Chametz" dude (dudette?) is a friend of mine. He/She links to my post, and comments on it, here. Our conversation will soon be featured on the Fox telecast of "When Blogs Collide!"

More Support for the Psak

Turns out that I was not the only one dealing with this halakhic issue. Some blogger wrote about it and you can see his discussion here. DO NOT BE FOOLED - his blog "Biur Chametz" looks exactly like mine. Rackenfracken templates, now I have to change the colors!

The Real Cheese

For those who are skeptical about the dollar value for the hello kitty grilled cheese, see this story in Slate about the $28000 original. Note, I made a cheese sandwich this morning (and am in the process of eating it) and, hey, it looks like a cloud.

Hello Kitty Grilled Cheese Sandwich

Bid quickly - especially if you were outbid on the Virgin Mary grilled cheese sandwich, the Hello Kitty Sandwich is still available:

eBay item 5536791340 (Ends Nov-25-04 14:19:11 PST) - A Cute Miracle! Hello Kitty Grilled Cheese Sandwich!

Psak Reaction

I wrote that two weeks ago I ruled that the shul wouldn't say tachanun in reaction to the death of Arafat. While most of the congregation applauded the loss of tachanun, if not the loss of our enemy, there was some opposition. One member asked me for the sources of the halakha and I have spent the time since shoring up the halakhic support for the psak.

First of all, the Shulchan Arukh is very clear in Orech Chaim 575:11-13 that when we fast for rain, and the rain falls, we can say Hallel. Siman 576 then expands the need to fast to all difficult situations - including a feared enemy.

In any case, every shul Rav I've spoken to agrees that we have the power to suspend tachanun for a communal simcha, but that wasn't enough for the textually minded. Two poskim - one black, one white - ruled on the matter. Rav Nachum Rabinovich, the Rosh Yeshiva of Ma'ale Adumim, agreed with my decision (said that I did the right thing) and said that since tachanun was a minhag, I as Maara d'Atra could make that decision.

Rav Ephraim Greenblatt (the famed Rivevot Ephraim, whom I know from Memphis) was less enthusiastic about my ruling but said that I had halakhic grounding, specifically the Chaya Adam, klal 155, siman 41.

Rav Greenblatt pointed out that people associate omitting tachanun with the death of a tzadik and thus my psak was difficult. I explained that the omission of tachanun is only with the yahrzeit of a tzadik - the death of a tzadik (according to the Shulchan Arukh) requires everyone who hears to tear kriah! However, the death of an enemy requires rejoicing and the yahrzeit is forgotten (because of the yimach-shemo stuff)

Since then, it was pointed out to me that there were those in Israel who ruled the same as I: see this story from (ugh) Arutz-7.

It's gratifying to know that my halakhic-intuition was on the mark.

Elvis Has Arrived

A successful low-ball purchasing spree from Digitaleyes yielded [dramatic music] Bubba Ho-Tep! You remember, the Elvis vs. Mummy movie with Bruce Campbell. Yeah, that one.

Thank you... thank you very much.

And this was a Blue State

According to this New York Times story (5 Killed in Hunting Dispute in Wisconsin):

BIRCHWOOD, Wis. (AP) -- As several deer hunters made their way through the woods of northern Wisconsin, they were startled to come upon a stranger in their tree stand. .... Asked to leave, the trespasser, wearing blaze-orange and carrying a semiautomatic assault rifle, opened fire on the hunters and didn't stop until his 20-round clip was empty, leaving five people dead and three wounded, authorities said.

Makes you feel glad the assault weapon ban was led to die in Congress. Or else these men would have been killed by a crazed deer!

{2009 Update: link fixed to this CBS story. And pic of crazy gun from here.}

What If: If Kerry Had Won

Then maybe SpaghettiOs would still be made by Franco-American!

Here We Go With Stage Two

If I ever run for public office, I believe my platform will begin with a public condemnation of PETA. The "animal rights" organization is filled with pernicious wrong-headed views (that would allow me to bash the Left). The newest stage of their lunacy: Fish Rights.

Check it out.

Hatzoloh Should Recruit Him

According to this AP story, David Lee Roth of Van Halen fame is becoming an EMT in New York City.

He's Jewish, so I think Hatzoloh should give him a call. How cool is that?

Political Discourse: Texas Style

Put up your dukes.

Getting Messy

The world is getting messy quick. Colin Powell resigned from Sec. of State today and considering who they have to replace Ashcroft, I expect Zell Miller to be the replacement. Goss, the new CIA chief is leading a "shakeup" (to use the Times term), Condeleeza Rice may be the new State (which means a new Nat Sec Director) and ODB died. A full week.

The CIA story is the most important in my eyes. This is simultaneous with a shakeup in the FBI and the new department of concentrated Intelligence Agencies (or whatever) being created. This means (a) our intelligence agencies are being gutted and will spend more time keeping their bureaucracies alive than keeping us alive, (b) in a battle between the FBI or CIA and the President, back the FBI/CIA.

I'll explain. As soon as I admitted that, yes, Goofy was elected in '04, I said to whatever Republican wandered into my path, that they could have done this the easy way - by having Bush go down gracefully - but now we gotta go the impeachment route.

Unless Clinton, who basically did nothing, Bush and his Band of Happy Elves have done so many prosecutable actions that only their tight control of information and curtain of radiating fear keeps them in power.

Bush is Nixon. Nixon was finally caught. Who did it? Yup, Woodward & Bernstein.

Actually, they didn't. They were just young and ambitious enough to be witting pawns of two very powerful agencies. The first was the man "Deep Throat" (whose identity we still don't know) but who was leaking all the damning info to Woodward.

The second, and most important agency was the FBI. FBI Director J. Edgar Hoover was the most powerful man in America - he had secret info and surveillance on hundreds of politicians and he knew all the skeletons. He died on May 2, 1972. His successor, L. Patrick Gray was cut from very different cloth (e.g. Gray appointed the first women as Special Agents, see the FBI website).

Gray and the new FBI leadership did not play Hoover's games and they went hard and heavy after the Watergate break-in. The key elements to the Woodstein stories were the grand-jury investigations opened by the FBI.

Put simply, the FBI put the President out of business. And I pray to God that they do it again.

Thunder & Lightning

My thunder & lightning theory of babies crying:

Just as you wait after seeing lighting, counting the seconds before the thunder, to see how far away the storm is. Well, that works with babies too - when you hear the first little "weh" you wait for a few seconds, each second will tell you if it's a cry of wet or tired or aliens from planet zoombah.